Regarding muttering.

This is where I spent my afternoon.  Wandering around, muttering to myself like an old person dumped in a nursing home.  Do I buy one big thing or a bunch of little things, or both?  What is the etiquette these days?  And what is half of this shit?  (I should admit that some of the items in this local superstore for breeders were really cute.  But I just can’t mutter those words at the same time as all of the other non-kid friendly words that came to mind.)

Oh, and while I was checking out with my stack of stuff and multiple pages of a gift registry, the register clerk saw a ripe sales opportunity.  That makes me laugh as I type it.  Talk about misreading an audience!  It went like this:

Her:  Do you have a rewards card?

Me: (smirking) No.

Her: Would you like to signup for a rewards card and start earning rewards on your purchases.

Me: (biting tongue) No thank you

Her:  Will you be using your Babies r Us credit card to pay for today’s purchase?

Me: (no longer trying conceal snarkiness): Uh, No!

Her:  Would you like to apply for a card and save 10%?

Me:  (enough already) NO, I’m good.  Really!

They don’t just push strollers at the local Babies r Us.  Seriously lady, lay off the crack pipe already.  It’s a baby store.